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Who is TMarie?

TMarie grew up mostly overseas in a conservative, Catholic, military family. She was born three months premature, looked perpetually mal-nourished, and was often mistaken for a hairless boy. Her three older brothers referred to her simply as, “The Pest.” TMarie’s teen years were an exercise in constant awkwardness and social anxiety, fraught with embarrassing disasters.

Since her family didn’t have a television, TMarie found solace in reading hundreds of her parents’ books – meticulously searching for any shred of content that was even vaguely sexual. When her parents’ book selection failed to satisfy her curiosity, she found her way to the library, where a whole new world opened up. Since then, TMarie has enjoyed reading thousands of books and has expanded her repertoire far beyond the ones with naughty bits in them.

As a senior in high school, TMarie discovered a passion for writing, but often took her writing (and life) too seriously, filling dozens of notebooks with poems of unrequited love and angst. She went on to serve in the Army for four years, where she met and then stalked her future husband, Todd.

For reasons beyond comprehension, Todd enjoyed her social awkwardness, utter lack of humor, and even the stalking. Though they made an unlikely pair, TMarie agreed to marry Todd for two excellent reasons: One, because he was amazing in bed, and two, because he could make you laugh until tears streamed down your face and you lost all control of bodily functions and fluids.

For eighteen years, Todd has been helping the not-funny TMarie learn to look at life humorously. Through her website, unfunnyme.com, TMarie shares her unique view of the world and invites readers to enjoy the unfunnier side of life, where the serious is never taken seriously and not-funny is the new funny.

TMarie is the author of five unfinished novels, one finished-but as-yet-unpublished children’s book, and a half zillion short stories, essays, poems, screenplays and ramblings which are also unpublished – but not necessarily unread. She is a graduate of the School of Information and Library Science at UNC Chapel Hill, a self proclaimed “irreverent idea developer” and the author, producer and designer of unfunnyme.com.

She once sneezed 27 times consecutively, is terrified of hotdogs (the kind you eat), has chronic insomnia (which requires her to spend way too much time with herself without a break) and loves Twinkies – a product she considers both tasty and fascinating, but underrated by the world at-large.

TMarie lives in Maryland with her hilarious husband, three wacky children, and three insane dogs. You can ask her anything via PILLOW TALK or just send an email to: tmarie(at)unfunnyme(dot)com.

 

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